Christmas Fare

Following Crick's Pumpkin Pie thread, I thought it would be good to have a thread for all our Christmas baking and recipes?! I LOVE cooking at Christmas, and have a few things to share, although give me a day or so.....anyway, to kick off my festivitiies I would like to recommend the following recipe:


A glass
A gurt slug of brandy
A gurt slug of port

Merry Christmas!!

Well it's too late for me to share my Christmas cake and pudding recipes - should have thought of it in September!!

Blimey Dave, Christmas comes early in Bath doesn't it?

Here's my recipe.

Take one big turkey - and FUCKING LEAVE IT ALONE TO CELEBRATE THE NEW YEAR, RATHER THAN TO SUFFER A HORRIFIC PREMATURE DEATH!

Peace on earth to all creatures.

And what about the little turkeys?

Justice wrote:

Here's my recipe.

Take one big turkey - and FUCKING LEAVE IT ALONE TO CELEBRATE THE NEW YEAR, RATHER THAN TO SUFFER A HORRIFIC PREMATURE DEATH!

Peace on earth to all creatures.

Ah bless, J you do make me feel all warm and fluffy inside with your compassionate heart

Justice wrote:

Here's my recipe.

Take one big turkey - and FUCKING LEAVE IT ALONE TO CELEBRATE THE NEW YEAR, RATHER THAN TO SUFFER A HORRIFIC PREMATURE DEATH!

Peace on earth to all creatures.

But turkeys are stupid! They eat so much that they fall off their legs. But you're right, it's cruel. We're having goose this year

No Cat, turkeys are genetically engineered so that they are so large breasted they can't mate naturally. That's not stupidity, that's cruelty.

A bit like Jordan you mean? She shouldn't be allowed to breed. I'd like to see her slaughtered for Christmas.

I think you're confusing genetic engineering with plastic surgery. You'd have trouble fitting her in the oven too!

Buns in the oven?

he'd put one in her oven.

I can think of very little less appealing than that Dave.

Tom'd give her one in the wrong 'un, but I don't think he (Harvey) would be that impressed.


Oh dear, have I gone too far?

If you mean Harvey the white rabbit, I think Tom's already given it one.

I've stuffed a few turkeys in the past.

Did they gobble?

No, I had to strangle the chicken.

Amulet wrote:

No Cat, turkeys are genetically engineered so that they are so large breasted they can't mate naturally. That's not stupidity, that's cruelty.

Yes but they're still stupid. Most animals get a bit apprehensive at slaughter - turkeys just stand there watching their fellows get killed and still happily follow on through - still at least I suppose that means they're not stressed at the end.

Either way they're bloody delicious!

When I was a kid, my Dad worked for Longmont Foods (the supplier for Butterball Turkeys) and I saw how they raised the turkeys that were packaged and sold for human consumption... I have never been able to eat turkey again.

At Christmas I prefer to bake a ham... I know how pigs are raised and slaughtered too, but I didn't personally witness it so it doesn't affect me as deeply. Also, a ham doesn't look like an animal carcass the way a turkey does... it's only a small part of a pig where the turkey is still in one piece.
...
btw... I don't eat any dead animals, so don't start in about how it's just as cruel to eat a pig or whatever.


We have a family recipe for Jam Cake that I love to make at Christmas... it's a cake spiced with Cloves, laced with walnuts and sweetened with Blackberry Jam then baked in a Bundt Pan. It is perfect for the Holidays... I'd share the recipe, but I was sworn to secrecy when my aunt passed the recipe down to me. You can find similar recipes online, but none as good as our secret family recipe.

"Most animals get a bit apprehensive at slaughter" - Bloody cowards. You wouldn't catch me getting a bit apprehensive at slaughter.

I wouldn't eat a turkey to celebrate the birth of Christ, but I'd happily do so as I watched them nail the fucker to the cross.

Oooooh I love secret family recipes! Very mysterious!

Justice wrote:

I wouldn't eat a turkey to celebrate the birth of Christ, but I'd happily do so as I watched them nail the fucker to the cross.

What did he ever do to you? You're not THAT old that you actually remember him are you J?

I'm actually his dad. He was an obnoxious twat, all that guff about walking on water and healing lepers - still fools a few idiots even now, but most people are seeing through the lies these dasys.