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If you can't stand the heat . . . . . .

If you can't stand the heat . . . . . .
 
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 first joke of the New Year

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Dave Larkhall

Dave Larkhall


Posts : 840
Join date : 2009-09-02
Age : 81
Location : Larkhall Bath

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PostSubject: first joke of the New Year   first joke of the New Year Icon_minitimeWed Jan 06, 2010 5:35 pm

At Sunday church the local Vicar explains that he must move on to a larger congregation that
will pay him more.

There is a hush within the congregation. No one wants him to leave because he is so popular.

Fred Smith, who owns several car dealerships in Southend and Basildon , stands up and proclaims: 'If the
Vicar stays, I will provide him with a new Ford every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport
their children!'

The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds.

Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and publican, stands and says, ‘If the Vicar will stay on here,
I'll personally double his salary and establish a foundation to guarantee private secondary school education
of his children!'

More sighs and loud applause.

Agnes Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, 'If the Vicar stays, I will give him sex.'

There is total silence.

The Preacher, blushing, asks her: 'Mrs. Jones, you're a wonderful and holy lady, whatever possessed
you to say that?'

Agnes's 90-year old husband, Joe, is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand
and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies:

'Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, 'Fuck him'.
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The-duke66

The-duke66


Posts : 830
Join date : 2009-09-02
Age : 58
Location : Daydream land

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PostSubject: Re: first joke of the New Year   first joke of the New Year Icon_minitimeThu Jan 07, 2010 12:23 pm

Best Joke of the year so far Dave. Laughing
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rugbyboy

rugbyboy


Posts : 433
Join date : 2009-09-03
Age : 66
Location : Kingston./.London

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PostSubject: Re: first joke of the New Year   first joke of the New Year Icon_minitimeThu Jan 07, 2010 6:14 pm

When i heard about the new sperm donation by post service

i was so excited , i came in a jiffy
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PostSubject: Re: first joke of the New Year   first joke of the New Year Icon_minitime

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